Note to Self: When in Doubt, Go WITHOUT...

Friday, April 15, 2016

...saying anything that might could would morph into a massive unloading [read: demented rant] from which your fingers may never recover. Not to mention the things you would just have to turn around and repent anyway. Right Jennifer? You betcha. So. In lieu of posting a twenty page diatribe explaining the circumstances I alluded to in my last post (found here, for those of you looking sideways at the screen and scratching your head in confusion) I'm going for the "less is more" version. I will, however, offer you a bulleted summary to accompany the picture to the left. Said picture being worth FAR more than a measly 1,000 words because it is an incredibly accurate depiction of my mental state during the time in question (albeit a disturbing one). Well, maybe not the male gender/mustache part. And yes, I entertained myself with the bullets in my little summary (what did you expect? ;o)

To quote Sergeant Friday (on a Friday no less), "Just the facts, Ma'am."
 My father got sick, then became ill (as in tempered). Then he got really ill (as in go to the hospital). What started as a plain old "vomit virus", turned into something far more serious over the course of a couple weeks.
 Ultimately, Dad required the better part of a week in the hospital which, in turn, required me to spend the better part of the week sleeping at my parent's house with Mom (Alzheimer's patients do not do well with any change in environment). This was, of course, in addition to working full time, caring for the horses, and spending time at the hospital. 
 Turned out my Dad had a pinched intestine (and did we even know that was a thing? Nope), which was ultimately - and thankfully - resolved without surgery.

It probably goes without saying that I ran around like a crazy woman throughout all of this at warp speed from home to work to hospital to home to Mom's and then back home again in the wee hours the next day.

I also learned quite a bit about myself and (hopefully), I stretched and grew a little more spiritually and grace-fully. Ummm...How about this: I definitely grew, but it wasn't very pretty. Here's the rest (as politely as I'm able to phrase it):

 I love my parents. I really do, but they are not always easy (or pleasant) to be around. My dad, who is never sick, has to be the worst patient I think I have ever encountered (I'll take sick whiny kids any day). 
 It is a darn good thing that God's grace is sufficient, because I had nowhere NEAR enough of it for either one of my parents: both of whom managed to surprise (shock?) me with some truly obnoxious and downright hateful behavior.
 Silver Lining? (sort of): It is absolutely possible, when you toss in enough stress-filled frantic, to drop five pounds in a single week without even trying (yes, I really did).
💡 I did a tremendous amount of introspection in the weeks that followed, and ultimately realized that I had a veritable boatload of unresolved emotions and resentments when it came to my parents that stemmed from years of internalizing. A BIG boat. Okay, maybe more like an armada. Since it is not my intention to engage in a round of "bash the parents" (a.k.a. the temptation from which I was - barely - delivered), I'll just say that there are people on this earth who can - and do - take condescension, [what I call] "destructive" criticism and personal dissatisfaction to a whole new level. I suppose one could also say that teenagers are not the only ones with the mindset that precious little outside of their own wants and needs should be considered. Yep, one could say that all right... *Ahem*. 
'Nuff said.
 I learned that setting healthy boundaries can be a wonderful and truly amazing thing. Just be sure to seek counseling from a trusted source first, and be as kind as as you can (in my case it was our pastor and a very close friend). I also had to give myself a couple added weeks of "calm down" time before drawing that line in the sand to keep things from turning ugly on my part. (I never said I was perfect ;o)
The end result?
I guess some people are just going to be the toast crumbs in your butter no matter what you do. Sort of a weird analogy, I guess, (but I'm hungry ;o)

So there you have it: my little tale of whoa (was me). As to the past couple of weeks? Busy, busy, busy. My bender is back; in spades! Hopefully, I'll have some pictures for you next time to show you what I've been up to. All I can say is Pinterest is a double-edged sword (handy, but dangerous). Have a blessed week, and stay sane. At least try. *laugh*


  1. I'm going to send you some virtual hugs because it sounds like you could use a few. I'm glad to hear your dad is doing ok and I can't imagine having all that on my plate at one time

    1. Ann: Thank you for the comment (happy to know you are still speaking to me *laugh*). More importantly, thanks for the hug - I definitely needed it ;o)

  2. Wow! Yes, God's Grace is sufficient - and it readily flows through you. "crumbs in the butter" - love it! And btw - I thought you looked skinny!

    1. Kimby: Not sure how well it flows through me yet (I'm thinking you cornered the market there, chickie, as you have more grace than pretty much anyone I know ;o) but I'm up to a mostly steady trickle, anyway. Don't know about the skinny part either, but I did manage to get back into a pair of "pre-chemo" jeans the other day. I could still breathe with them on, too. *grin* Methinks things might be lookin' up.

Your comments really brighten my day!

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